Twas the night before Thanksgiving and out of the house,
Tiger Woods came a flyin, chased by his spouse,
She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,
Cause a bimbo's phone number was on his Blackberry,
Tiger been cheatin on Elin, and the story progressed
Woman after woman stepped up and confessed
He'd been cheatin with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cory
With Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.
From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,
Tiger's sad sordid tale was all over the news.
With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex
When not in their pants, he was sendin them texts
Despite all his cryin and beggin and pleadin
Tigers wife went investin - a new home in Sweden
And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade
IF YOU'RE GETTIN LAID, THEN I'M GETTIN PAID
She's not pouting, if fact, she is of good cheer
He pre-nup made Christmas come early this year
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